It’s highly doubtful that anyone will ever re-watch Shainee Gabel’s A Love Song for Bobby Long (‘04), a New Orleans-set relationship film costarring John Travolta and Scarlet Johansson. But I remember it vividly because of the snarky alternate title that some industry smartass coined at the time of release — Bobby Way–Too–Long.
HE is asking for other classic re-titlings of movies that ran into a brick wall — parody titles that in some cases became as well known as the originals.
The fact that Steve Martin “went through” an impressive line of hot, classy numbers in the ‘80s and ‘90s (which I also would have done with absolute sincerity and relish if I’d been in Martin’s shoes) is common knowledge — Linda Ronstadt, Bernadette Peters, Victoria Tennant, etc. But I’d completely forgotten that Martin was deeply involved with poor Anne Heche between October ‘94 and early ‘97, and that it ended when she dumped him cold for Ellen DeGeneres. That’s the legend, at least. Things were probably winding down of their own accord before Heche’s historic get-together with DeGeneres at the March ‘97 Vanity Fair Oscar after-party.
HE regrets the substance of the news passed along to People’s Elizabeth Leonard by an Anne Heche rep:
One of the most loathsome and repellent social media practices is to rip into someone famous for having tweeted unenlightened stuff a decade or more ago. Or, in the case of the deeply annoying Taika Waititi, nine years ago.
Tweeting transphobic dismissals or dead-naming a trans person is unfortunate within any time frame, but trans consciousness has obviously evolved by leaps and bounds over the last five or six years, and it doesn’t seem quite fair to roast Waititi today for having been behind the curve in 2013.
I’ll never be a Waititi fan, but the fanatics need to cut the guy a little slack.
Friendo: “I don’t think her grillz work. She should cut her hair and wear suits or something.”
HE: “I wasn’t even sure what ‘grillz’ meant when she said that. Teeth, of course, but what the fuck? Fucking blue teeth?”
Friendo: “It’s a hip-hop thang. She looks like a midget.”
HE: “She’s in good shape mentally and spiritually, but she looks like a kind of mannequin balloon. She doesn’t look human.”
Friendo: “Her body is so tiny and her head so big. It’s a strange look. Makes me sad. I followed her and admired her my whole life. But she’s umable to handle age
HE: “She’s not that small. 5’4 and 1/2 inches.”
Friendo: “I think age has made her recede a bit.”
Urban Dictionary: “Caps or fitting worn over ones teeth, either on top, bottom, or both. To be mostly made out of gold, silver, diamond, or platinum.
Two lines are spoken in the teaser, and I can’t make heads or tails. I need help, please — thanks.
Timothee Chalamet: “Yadohn pickalum peppers.”
Taylor Russell: “Waikiki is forev-yuh.”‘
Costarring in this Reagan-era road odyssey (UA Releasing, 11.23) are Mark Rylance, Michael Stuhlbarg, André Holland, Jessica Harper, Chloë Sevigny, Francesca Scorsese (daughter of Marty) and David Gordon Green.
Attorney General Merrick Garland, a highly cautious man, didn’t want to say anything about the FBI Mar-a-Lago document raid or reveal the contents of the search warrant, but MAGA nutters have created such a stink since the raid that Garland has decided to unseal the search warrant, if only to take heat off the FBI.
Former President Donald Trump (aka Orange Plague) could have revealed the contents of the warrant any time since the raid, but he hasn’t.
“Given the intense public interest presented by a search of a residence of a former President, the government believes these factors favor unsealing the search warrant, its accompanying Attachments A and B, and the Property Receipt, absent objection from the former President.” — from DOJ motion to unseal Mar-a-Lago search warrant.
Obviously The Menu is a black social satire. The focus is on the repulsion that some gifted artists feel for consumers, including the rich elite. The idea, apparently, is that Slowik, the celebrity chef behind an exclusive restaurant called Hawthorne, is a sociopath. He’s probably a variation of Leslie Banks‘ “Count Zaroff” in The Most Dangerous Game (’32). The menu ingredients probably have something to do with cannibalism or, you know, gourmet-level “soylent green.”
The Searchlight pic will debut at the 2022 Toronto International Film Festival, and will open theatrically on 11.18.22.
“…but it’s not funny to me.” — Democratic gubernatorial candidate Beto O’Rourke to heckling Greg Abbott supporter in Mineral Wells, Texas, two or three hours ago.
Moments like these are magnetic bullets…bullets that are infinitely repeated on social media, and which everyone sees and responds to favorably or negatively. Methinks this is a huge boost for O’Rourke. He might win now.
Throughout most of the ’90s, when you thought of Brad Pitt you thought of two moments in David Fincher‘s Se7en — the head-in-a-box finale and the Yoda line. (Detective David Mills is as classic a character as Humphrey Bogart‘s Fred C. Dobbs.). And it stayed that way until Fincher’s Fight Club (’99), when Tyler Burden took over. The Durden thing reigned for eight years, and then came three landmark roles in relatively quick succession — Jesse James in The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford (’07), the dumbshit workout-instructor role in Burn After Reading (’08), and Billy Beane in Moneyball (’11), which is still Pitt’s finest all-time performance.
