Sometime in ’99 or ’00, I posted an an idea (which was re-posted on 5.1.12) for one big super-parody of all CG superhero disaster monster zombie films. A movie that would hit you with everything imaginable in the realm of horror and catastrophe, but piled on to the point of comic absurdity. Tidal waves and earthquakes and a rogue asteroid slamming into earth, and thousand-year-old zombies being awoken by the rumbling as well as dinosaurs — dinosaurs battling zombies! — and vampires and wolf men and slithering CG serpents, and eventually each and every world-famous landmark being destroyed (Burj Khalifa, Eiffel tower, Grand Canyon) while zombies eat Frankenstein alive and Dracula has his head bitten off by a T-Rex. And then a second meteor hits and further onslaughts of super tidal waves and earthquakes ensue, and by the end everything and everyone is buried and burned all to hell or drowned in sea water.

Don’t tell me someone hasn’t pitched this. The problem is that the corporate whore machine is way too invested in maintaining and fortifying existing revenue streams. If they were truly free of heart and spirit they might go in my direction and just pull out all the stops and go full whacko.