Susan Wloszczyna‘s USA Today story about movie phenome- nons winks at (but doesn’t fully acknowledge) the all-but-certain fact that Snakes on a Plane is not the next phenomenon, but is, in fact, a pheno- menon already. In the meantime, we get a bunch of half-assed definitions, recollections, and a big chart going all the way back to Porky’s. (I just tried to remember how to spell Wloszczyna’s name without looking it up, and I blew it again. It’s the most impossible-to-remember last name in the history of impossible-to-remember last names. I don’t even know how to pronounce it. Is it supposed to sound like “Vlossinya“?)