To go by this Japanese teaser, Snow White and the Huntsman (Universal, 6.1) is the Snow White legend injected with CG insanity and made for swordplay-and-martial-arts-loving fanboys. At least it has a significantly different attitude and tone than Tarsem Singh‘s Mirror Mirror. Is Snow White really called “Snow” in this thing or…? (“Hey, Snow…what up?) There are eight dwarves in this rather than seven.

It’s all in the Wiki synopsis: “In a kingdom ruled by tyranny, the vain and selfish Queen Ravenna (Charlize Theron) learns her stepdaughter Snow White (Kristen Stewart) is destined to surpass her as not only the “Fairest One of All” but the kingdom’s future ruler. But the Queen then learns from her Magic Mirror (Christopher Obi) that the only way to remain in power is to consume Snow’s heart and achieve immortality.

“Snow escapes into the Dark Forest and Ravenna recruits the Huntsmen Eric (Chris Hemsworth) to kill Snow. Eric however takes pity on the young princess and teaches Snow White the art of war. Now, with the aid of eight dwarves and Prince William (Sam Claflin), Snow White begins a rebellion to bring down her stepmother once and for all.”

The dwarves are not named Sleepy, Doc, Grumpy, Dopey, Bashful, Happy and Snoopy.

Their names are Beith, Quert, Muir, Coll, Duir, Gus, Gort and Nion, and they’re played by Ian McShane, Johnny Harris, Bob Hoskins, Toby Jones, Eddie Marsan, Brendan Gleeson, Ray Winstone and Nick Frost, respectively

I was kidding about Snoopy, of course. That’s actually an Elliot Gould joke from California Split.

Twenty dwarves took turns doing handstands on the carpet. Twenty dwarves took turns doing handstands on the carpet. Twenty dwarves took turns doing handstands on the carpet.