The word “surreal” came to mind as I began watching this Orson Welles pop-song-scored trailer for Turn Me On Dammit (New Yorker, 3.30). I then began to think it might have been a brilliant thing to marry Welles’ song, recorded in 1984, to the Turn Me On trailer. Loony but brilliant. The work of a deranged mind. Beyond the Valley of the Insane.

I wrote Turn Me On‘s marketing maestro Reid Rosefelt and asked if this was his idea, and he said nope — he’d only just been told about it.

It must be said that Jannicke Systad Jacobsen‘s film, a dry and low-key teen sex comedy, has none of the sentimental emotional current contained in the song.

Turn Me On, Dammit will be viewable on Constellation TV on Thursday, 3.22 and 5 pm Pacific.

The film’s copy line belongs to Reid, I think: “How comes there are so many movies about a teenage boy who want to have sex and this is the only one about a teenage girl who wants to have sex?”

Welles’ Wiki page says that in late 1984, or roughly a year before his death, Welles recorded a music single, titled “I Know What It Is To Be Young (But You Don’t Know What It Is To Be Old).” It was done for Compagnia Generale del Disco. The song was performed with the Nick Perito Orchestra and the Ray Charles Singers and produced by Jerry Abbott who was father to famed Metal Guitarist Dimebag Darrell.”

The lyrics are as follows:

“When we are young age has no meaning

i never gave it a second thought

until one day along came this old man

and this is what he said to me

yes, this is what he said to me

“i know what it is to be young

but you, you don’t know what it is to be old

someday you’ll be saying the same thing

time takes away so the story is told

“I have so many questions

for the wise man i met

couldn’t find all the answers

no one has theirs as yet

“There’ll be days to remember

full of laughter and tears

after summer comes winter

so go the years

“So my friend let’s make music together

i’ll play the old while you sing me the new

in time when your young days are over

there’ll be someone sharing their time with you.”