Cannes Film Festival-wise, we’re looking at a COVID-19 flashing amber situation. Pack two or three boxes of pre-moistened sanitizing hand towelettes. Who isn’t imagining scores of journos adorned in N95 face masks, waiting to get into the Salle Debussy? I’ve been expecting to see a drop in NYC-Milan RT fares — so far coach prices are hovering around $600. Is that really the best they can do?

On a scale of one to ten, how dumb do you have to be to believe that Corona beer has something to do with the spread of COVID-19?