What Kind of Weenie Suburban Husband…

.. goes to his wife and says “oh, mommy, a scary prostitute offered to give me a blowjob inside a parked car at the Norwalk Walmart, but I resisted…I kept my honor”?

What kind of a man would even think of running to his wife and going “waaahhh, I was almost sexually compromised”? You pathetic little mouse.

This apparently actually happened today.