If by some curious twist of fate James Cameron takes the Best Director Oscar instead of Kathryn Bigelow (as indicated by Pete Hammond, Ed Douglas, Scott Feinberg, Dave Karger, Kevin Lewin, Michael Musto and Sam Rubin predicting that Cameron will take the Best Director Golden Globe), Cameron will be obliged to say the following to the Academy:

“Thank you all from the bottom of my heart and from everyone on Team Avatar, but I have to say you made a mistake. Kathryn Bigelow deserves this Oscar more than I do because she had less to work with than I did, and she still made a great war film. Not just kick-ass but emotional and granular and profound — for the ages. This was her year — everyone knew that — and you guys blew her off to pay tribute to the fact that Avatar made over a billion dollars. Well, thanks sincerely, guys. I love you for this — and please, please don’t take offense at this because I really am grateful as hell — but I have to say ‘thanks very much but no thanks.’ Kathryn? C’mon up here. This Oscar belongs to you.”