I was awoken at 4:30 am by the sound of that snoring ape upstairs. Yes, the Hispanic Party Elephant of legend. Who sleeps in a bedroom directly above mine. His snoring is so guttural and persistent that once you’ve awakened there’s no going back to sleep. And the sound of the thonging mattress springs and the bed frame creaking and groaning for dear life when he rolls over is appalling. It’s sublime knowing I won’t have to deal with this guy (who fancies himself to be a crooner, by the way — he sings Spanish love ballads as he clomps down the stairs on his way to work) any more after 10.30.09.