“After reading erroneous reports about Tom Cruise and United Artists, I would like to clarify that we are honored that he will continue as our full partner in control of UA. He is in the middle of one of the greatest careers our industry has ever seen and one that will continue at the top of United Artists Entertainment.” — a statement from MGM chairman and CEO Harry Sloan, received at 12:08 pm.

“To be truly challenging, a voyage, like a life, must rest on a firm foundation of financial unrest. Otherwise, you are doomed to a routine traverse, the kind known to yachtsmen who play with their boats at sea — cruising, it is called. Voyaging belongs to seamen, and to the wanderers of the world who cannot, or will not, fit in. If you are contemplating a voyage and you have the means, abandon the venture until your fortunes change. Only then will you know what the sea is all about.

“‘I’ve always wanted to sail to the south seas, but I can’t afford it,’ some men say. What these men can’t afford is not to go. They are enmeshed in the cancerous discipline of security. And in the worship of security we fling our lives beneath the wheels of routine, and before we know it our lives are gone.
“What does a man need — really need? A few pounds of food each day, heat and shelter, six feet to lie down in, and some form of working activity that will yield a sense of accomplishment. That’s all in the material sense, and we know it.
“But we are brainwashed by our economic system until we end up in a tomb beneath a pyramid of time payments, mortgages, preposterous gadgetry, playthings that divert our attention for the sheer idiocy of the charade. The years thunder by, the dreams of youth grow dim where they lie caked in dust on the shelves of patience. Before we know it, the tomb is sealed.
“Where, then, lies the answer? In choice. Which shall it be: bankruptcy of purse or bankruptcy of life?” — the most oft-quoted passage from Sterling Hayden‘s Wanderer, which is required reading for every landlubber malcontent out there, particularly the under-25s.

“Convince yourself that the Republicans are just going to roll over and play dead because there is simply no life left in their party. Convince yourself this one is in the bag! Convince yourself that if you play by the rules, the Republicans will too. And when McCain and his people roll out their nuclear arsenal on you, just go all sweet and sensitive and logical.”

Oh, and always “believe that the truth shall prevail, that good people will see what the Republicans are up to. As they smear you, your family, your religious beliefs — cower, back down, go on the defensive.”
The preceding is an excerpt from rule #5 in Michael Moore‘s “How The Democrats Can Blow It…In Six Easy Steps,” posted yesterday on michaelmoore.com as a promotion for a book called “Mike’s Election Guide 2008” (Grand Central Publishing), due out on 8.26.

Peter Lauria‘s 8.14 report in the N.Y. Post‘s business section about the downfall of Tom Cruise and Paula Wagner within the MGM corporate family (Harry Sloan, Mary Parent, etc.) is the clearest and most concise-sounding assessment I’ve read so far. Having reached the conclusion that Cruise-Wagner “don’t know what they’re doing,” Sloan essentially “wants to get his hands on $500 million in financing that UA raised from Merrill Lynch last year so that he can help fund MGM movies,” and putting Parent in charge of the whole magillah is key to his strategy.
Lauria’s main points: (a) Cruise is “on the verge of getting fired yet again” as Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer CEO Harry Sloan looks to bring Cruise’s United Artists studio under the control of MGM production chief Mary Parent; (b)
a source saying that Sloan “made a mistake in backing those two, and now he’s trying to figure out how to rectify it”; (c) Wagner’s departure from UA is due to Sloan has having “effectively neutered Cruise and Wagner by putting Parent — a well-regarded Hollywood talent who MGM hired in March to oversee theatrical productions — in charge of UA”; (d) Wagner’s decision to leave is therefore a “protest” move, and that “her ego won’t stand for Parent being put in charge]…she’d be humiliated if she stayed there”; and (e) Sloan is likely to extend a feather-smoothing production deal to Wagner, meaning that UA would “continue to operate as an independent company” blah, blah, and that the “current management structure for UA has not changed…Tom and Paula are still running the day-to-day operations.”

Yesterday’s $7 million haul means that Tropic Thunder‘s 5-day projection has been downgraded to $38 to $40 million instead of $45 million, which is what Fantasy Moguls‘ Steve Mason was forecasting a day or so ago. The c.w. says Thunder wont be earning as much as Pineapple Express did over the first few days because (a) it plays to a somewhat older and more city-sophisticated crowd (whereas any amoeba in baggy shorts can laugh at a good stoner comedy) and (b) satire that plays to people with an IQ over 50 always faces a bit more of a challenge, no matter the subject. Of course, the notion that Tropic Thunder is loonier, funnier and more off-the-wall surreal has been kicking around also.

This Body of Lies trailer is slightly more complex than the one I posted two or three weeks ago, but a lot of the clips and a good amount of the dialogue are the same so whaddaya-whaddaya?

Politico‘s Jeffrey Ressner has written a savvy and thorough examination of the bogus smear story about George Clooney advising Barack Obama, which began with London’s Daily Mail.
“Part of the reason the Daily Mail frequently gets away with this kind of journalism is that relatively few people in the UK media call them out on these kinds of stories,” HE reader Ambrose Heron wrote last night. “I would urge you to check out a recent book by Nick Davies called Flat Earth News as there is a very interesting chapter on how the Daily Mail operates entitled ‘Mail Aggression.'”

I can only repeat again what I’ve been told by a fellow who’s been very close to the development of Edwin A. Salt, to wit: Tom Cruise wasn’t bumped by Angelina Jolie for the lead role — he hadn’t committed to signing because he didn’t feel comfortable about playing a character who, he felt, was too close to his Ethan Hunt character from the Mission Impossible films. I’m not saying that other factors didn’t come into play as well, but this is what I’ve heard from a guy in a position to know.

I was searching around and came across this thoroughly excellent Troggs song that I haven’t listened to in ages. I’d forgotten how scrumptious it is. Raw, honest, monaural, reverby.

Two British-produced films that were shot last fall and should by rights appear at the 2008 Toronto Film Festival are Gerald McMorrow‘s Franklyn, a kind of science-fiction fantasy piece costarring Sam Riley, Ryan Phillipe and Eva Green, and Beeban Kidron‘s Hippie Hippie Shake, an adaptation of Richard Neville‘s memoir about running Oz, the famed London counter-culture weekly, in the late ’60s. Cillian Murphy plays Neville; Sienna Miller plays significant other Louise Ferrier.

Sienna Miller in Hippie Hippie Shake.

Ryan Phillipe (reputedly) in Franklyn.

Both films are due to open in England later this year. and Hippie Hippie Shake, a Working Title production, is slated for release in the U.S. sometime in ’08 by Universal. Franklyn was mentioned in an Agence France Presse article as a possible Cannes 2008 selection, only it never happened.
The final Toronto Film Festival roster will be revealed on Tuesday, 8.19.

Hearty congratulations to voice actor Cedering Fox, a personal friend of this columnist whose Word Theatre shows have been mentioned on HE from time to time, for landing a great gig as the official announcer of the 2008 Democratic Convention in Denver.

Cedering Fox

Before I get to the point of this item, let’s take a quick gander at Andrew Fleming‘s Hamlet 2 (Focus Features, 8.27), which I’ve seen. It’s about a somewhat immature, emotionally imbalanced, self-loathing ex-actor and high school teacher (Steve Coogan) who stages an irreverent musical sequel to William Shakespeare‘s Hamlet co-starring himself and his students. Hamlet 2 was a comic hit at Sundance ’08, which led to its acquisition by Focus Features.

It’s two movies in one — an irreverent, somewhat downish comedy of manners and ineptitude about preparing the show (and fighting small-town elements who don’t want it performed) and the show itself, which turns out to be much slicker and professionally performed than you’re led to expect, and is fairly entertaining. And one of the big musical numbers [see You Tube clip below] is called “Rock Me Sexy Jesus.” Coogan — dressed in a dark beard, dark hippie hair and a white gown — plays the Christ figure in the number.
Yesterday, to finally get to the point, I received a tiny bobbing Coogan doll to promote the film — a mildly cute little thing. But there’s a little detail about it that seems…well, funny. Or weird. Even given the satirical “goof around with Jesus” tone that’s already part of the musical number.
The problem is this: look at the hands of the Coogan Jesus doll, and you’ll see he’s making the devil hand sign with his fingers (i.e., the index finger and the pinkie finger raised) and not the “hang loose” hand sign, which is conveyed with the thumb and the pinkie.
If you’re a football fan from Texas you’d say, “No, no, that’s just’ the ‘hook ’em, Longhorns’ sign.” Or if you’re a rock musician you’d say “No, no, that’s just a hand sign that all the rockers use.” But in a Jesus context (and particularly given the fact that Hamlet 2 takes place in Arizona, not Texas), the doll’s finger sign is still a little bit odd…no?
For clarity’s sake here are two images of the hang-loose sign — image #1, image #2.