Crowe Moe

I can’t say this with any more urgency. Somehow, some way, Peter and Bobby Farrelly have to get Russell Crowe to play Moe Howard in their Three Stooges movie, now that it’s finally been greenlit by MGM. Crowe is one of the funniest big-name guys out there. He knows what insanity is. He embraces it. I mean that as a compliment.

The Farrellys “will polish the script they wrote with Michael Cerrone and will direct the picture,” Variety‘s Michael Fleming wrote earlier today. The un-shot pic will open on 11.20.09.

Hilarious

The Root‘s Christopher Beam and Chris Wilson have posted a list of five things that white people don’t want to do in the wake of Barack Obama‘s victory:

1. Don’t personally congratulate all your black friends. Black people are not a sports team, and Obama did not win the Super Bowl.

2. Don’t declare that you “never thought you’d see the day.” You never thought you’d see the day?

3. Don’t start crossing the street in order to walk next to a black person. President Obama is glad you support racial reconciliation, but he takes a hard line against jaywalking.

4. Don’t name drop “Dr. King.” If you absolutely must make some comment about how this is a victory for civil rights, pick a marginally less obvious figurehead.

5. Don’t use the phrase “white people” in any way that suggests it doesn’t include you. Contrary to popular belief, having voted for Obama does not make you even “semi-down.” Sorry if there was any confusion there.”

In All Honesty

McCain’s concession speech was, I have to say it, moving. He was classy. He was choking up a bit. “The failure is not yours,” he said to the faithful, “but mine.” The right-wing crowd booed, of course, when he said that Obama had triumphed because they’re crude, low-life brownshirts. But McCain said “please” and — you have to give him this much — conceded with dignity. His eyes were moist. His voice cracked just a bit. I slightly felt for him.

Euphoria Breaks

MSNBC has just called the election for Barack Obama. Daily Kos is reporting that reporters have been “called out to the lawn” in anticipation of John McCain’s concession. Right after the West Coast tallies are announced, I presume. The rancid has lost. The stupefying Palin ugliness has been put in its place. As Keith Olbermann just put it, this is a “Man on the Moon” moment straight out of 1969. There is a God. I’m getting all choked up.

Regression Ends

“Even if your candidate didn’t win tonight, you have reason to celebrate,” Arianna Huffington wrote a little while ago. “We all do. Barack Obama‘s impressive victory says a lot about America. Because tonight voters decided that they didn’t want to look back. They wanted to step into the future. The history of America is studded with great breakthroughs followed by decades of consolidation and occasional regression. Tonight’s victory proclaims the end of the dark years of the Bush regression. It’s time for another American breakthrough.”

Just Asking

Whatever happened to the Bradley Effect? Has anyone seen it? Is it down at the liquor store picking up a couple of cases of Carta Blanca? Is it outside having a smoke?

It’s Over

MSNBC, CBS and Fox just gave Ohio to Barack Obama, and that, when you add in the Obama-leaning Florida and Pennsylvania already in the BHO column, is the whole magilla. Obama has this in the bag. New Mexico just went for Obama also. Forget it — McCain is done. Barack now has 200 electoral votes vs. 85 for McCain. I want McCain on that stage within two hours, no less, with a concession speech. I want his tail between his legs. Lie down, bitch!

Who Are These Guys?

What’s up with L.A. Times guy Patrick Day and World Entertainment News Network’s Kevin Lewin in Tom O’Neil‘s latest Gold Derby Oscar prediction chart? Seriously — what’s up with their waving off Kristin Scott Thomas‘s Best Actress chances? Neither are putting her in their favored five list? We need to mob up on these two, take ’em outside and slap ’em around.

Once Again

Zack and Miri makers Kevin Smith and Seth Rogen riffing on a MySpace video about the “fat guys don’t get hot girls in real life” concept — a rebuttal of sorts to my views along these lines. They don’t mention HE by name, but I’m pretty sure they’re talking about my reviews of Knocked Up and Zack and Miri. “Who writes that?” Rogen indignantly asks. “Skinny guys who can’t get laid…that’s who.”

Hoffman’s Rebound

It is standard Hollywood policy to elbow big-name male actors into secondary character roles once they hit their late 50s. And so Dustin Hoffman, one of the all-time acting legends whose leading-man career went great guns from the late ’60s to the early ’90s, has been playing colorful oddballs over the last decade or so. The last time he had a lead role with a seriously dimensional beating heart was (am I wrong?) in Stephen FrearsHero (’92).

But now he’s gotten hold of a solid lead role — a kind of soulful sad sack — in a modest but touching drama called Last Chance Harvey (Overture, 12.26). And it’s good to see Hoffman delivering again on this level. My guess is that others will concur. I’m not permitted at the moment to say anything about the film itself, but I can say this for sure — it’s agreeably restrained and well-mannered, and it doesn’t get in the way of Hoffman’s performance or that of his luminous costar, Emma Thompson.

As Harvey Shine, a Manhattan jingle writer on shaky professional ground, Hoffman hits a variety of notes that all say middle-aged downish — subdued, lamenting, glum, anxious, doleful, morose. But he’s determined to push all this aside and fly to London and attend his estranged daughter’s wedding. He’s not welcomed with open arms, having been a less-than-fully-loving and supportive dad, which is cause for more mood indigo.

And then, after he runs into Thompson’s Kate and starts to slowly succumb, Harvey (naturally, like anyone in his position) begins to warm up and radiate the good stuff. It’s like someone else is suddenly born within (as falling in love enzymes tend to manifest). He becomes likable, restrained, decent, manly, compassionate.

It’s a very pleasant arc, and is particularly seductive from a spectator standpoint since it allows — enables — one of our greatest actors to deliver a deeply winning performance.

There’s a third-act moment in particular when Harvey delivers a toast in front of a roomful of revellers at his daughter’s wedding reception. They’ve been treating him rather horridly and he’d be well within his rights, you think to yourself, to zap them back a little. But he doesn’t — and this is the moment when Hoffman and Harvey really won me over. The man shows class. He holds his ground and shows a touch of the gentle and the forgiving. He rises above.

It’s especially moving knowing that Hoffman, as he told me this morning, wrote this speech himself the night before filming. Along with his wife. Which goes to show that sometimes the stuff you write quickly with the pressure on (or the train coming round the bend) can work out very nicely.

I visited Hoffman at his Brentwood office this morning to talk things over. Here‘s the mp3, which I haven’t had time to edit. Yet. I have to bolt out of here and do errands but I’ll fill in with some more thoughts sometime later on. I can’t focus because of the election returns. I’m getting very anxious right about now.


Three Nickelodeon machines in the office suite of Punch Productions.

Spirit of the Day


Obama look-alike with stand-up comedian Laz Viciedo (r.) and unnamed female comedian, taken about a week ago.

Obama volunteers Cedering Fox, Cara Robin and volunteers in Las Vegas earlier today, prior to moving out into neighborhoods and doing door-to-door, get-out-the-vote work.

Cedering Fox, Cara Robin, Lillian Fox-Peckos.

Bumped

Tim Robbins tried voting at his NYC polling place earlier today,” TMZ reported about an hour ago. “There was some kind of ruckus and the cops were called. Apparently Robbins has been voting at that polling place for more than a decade, but today his name wasn’t on the register.

“They told Robbins he had to fill out a provisional ballot but he didn’t want to do it. An argument erupted between Robbins and the poll worker. Robbins allegedly got loud and the poll worker said he was calling the cops. Robbins accused the poll worker of trying to intimidate him so he wouldn’t vote.

“Robbins [then] went downtown to the City Board of Elections to get proof he was good to vote.”