Any movie featuring the assassination of Justin Beiber can’t be all bad. I can’t remember what I said before about Zoolander 2 but I take it back. Or I’m re-qualifying. I think. If it’s possible to cheekily lampoon 21st Century shallowness and self-absorption…hmmm. I was going to say that this looks half-funny (and it does) but…well, now I’m wondering about the difference between preening soul-cancer types of ’01 and right now. Ben Stiller starring, directing and co-writing with Justin Theroux. Owen Wilson, Penélope Cruz, Christine Taylor, Kristen Wiig, Will Ferrell, Cyrus Arnold, Billy Zane, Fred Armisen, et, al.

Director Rod Lurie attended a Warner Bros. lot screening tonight (i.e., Tuesday, 11.17) of Ryan Coogler‘s Creed (11.25), and posted an excited riff about it on his Facebook page: Unbroken long shots, which Lurie calls “oners” (an infuriating term), “are a little bit like breaking a four-minute mile. Bravo and all that, but it’s been done. Many times. But in Creed, the latest in the Rocky saga, director Ryan Coogler is kind of breaking the world record. And at the same time he achieves something that every director in the sports-movie genre is challenged with — finding a unique way to shoot a boxing match.

“There are three fights in Creed, and the middle one — the one in which the title character (Michael B. Jordan) makes himself a contender — is a doozy. Somehow Coogler and his director of photography, Maryse Alberti, shoot the whole thing — every punch, every miss, every duck, every uppercut, every yell from the corner, the between-round coaching from both corners, every cheer…everything in one take. And it’s not done with swish pans and running the lens through lights — i.e., no cheating. It’s the real deal all the way and genuinely thrilling.

The legendary Ian McKellen discussed his fabled career with director Guillermo del Toro in front of a packed house at Santa Monica’s Aero theatre this evening. A fine, spirited discussion between lions of their respective realms. Listen, celebrate Mr. Holmes (which screened at 9 pm), eat the popcorn and remember  that I caught McKellen’s performance as Salieri in Peter Shaffer‘s Amadeus 34 years ago on the Broadway stage.  Team Elsewhere (myself, HE’s own Svetlana Cvetko) had front-row seats but way off to the side — a shitty vantage point. Which meant I had to creep over and take semi-close-up shots while lying on the cement floor. And then it was autograph time when it ended (beware of super-aggressive GDT fanboys!) and then GDT and McKellen got into their big, humungous, jet-black SUV and took off…and then hung a right on Montana and pulled over in front of the theatre and got out to talk to fans again. Again, the mp3.

It was big news last May but it’s common knowledge by now: Jane Fonda takes ownership of Paolo Sorrentino‘s Youth (Fox Searchlight, 12.4) in the space of a single, blistering six-minute scene with costar Harvey Keitel. Her character, a feisty Brooklyn-born actress named Brenda Morel, visits a swank Swiss spa to tell Keitel’s Mick Boyle, an aging director and longtime colleague who’s written his latest movie for her, that she’s decided to take a TV role instead of starring in his project. Movies are over, she explains, and so is Boyle — he hasn’t made a good film in too long a time. Brenda’s message is so corrosive and scalding that Mick…okay, no spoilers.

Adorned with an almost Kabuki-like appearance created by director Paolo Sorrentino, Jane Fonda as the Brooklyn-born Brenda Morel in Youth.

During yesterday’s smallish joint press conference for Youth, Keitel, perhaps momentarily allowing his impressions of Brenda Morel to bleed into reality, referred to Fonda as a “diva.” Right away Jane, three seats away with Rachel Weisz and Paul Dano between them, flashed him a look. Keitel: “I mean in a good sense…why are you making a face at me?” Fonda: “I don’t see myself that way but I’ll accept it, I’ll take it.” Keitel: “Well, you’re a legend, an icon.” (The banter happens at the 16-minute mark of this recording.)

I’d been sitting with this extremely attuned icon in a second-floor hotel room an hour earlier, and frankly feeling disappointed with myself for not preparing better questions. I had arrogantly concluded before driving over to the Four Seasons that I knew so much about Fonda and felt such a rapport with her (we were both raised by dismissive, emotionally aloof fathers and more or less educated ourselves, and I don’t know what else…similar cockatoo attitudes about food, a certain alertness of mind, a fill-the-schedule attitude?) that I felt I didn’t need to cram. Mistake. Always cram, always prepare.

But then I listened to the recording….hmmm, okay, not bad, tolerable. What can you accomplish in 15 minutes? Not much. Lightweight questions, banter, mild chatter.

Last Thursday (11.12) I expressed a certain confusion over the new Carol one-sheet, which, I wrote, “seems to be aimed at potential viewers with conservative hinterland values,” as the photo suggests that Cate Blanchett “has a thing for Rooney Mara but that slightly out-of-focus Rooney isn’t noticing or isn’t that interested or something along those lines.” The cover art for Carter Burwell’s Carol soundtrack is another matter. If I was in charge of choosing the main movie poster, this is what I’d go with.

Two significant Love & Mercy plugs have happened over the last 24. One, today’s announcement about Santa Barbara Film Festival honcho Roger Durling having selected Love & Mercy‘s Elizabeth Banks and Paul Dano as Virtuoso award recipients (i.e., supporting-level award contenders) at next February’s Santa Barbara Film Festival (2.3 thru 2.13). And two, Youth costar Jane Fonda — herself a Best Supporting Actress contender — offered a big Dano plug at the start of yesterday’s Youth press conference at the Four Seasons hotel. Fonda: “Oh my God. I live with a music producer [Richard Perry] and so I know about Brian Wilson and the fact that he’s a genius, and so I wanted to see the movie. And [Paul], as the younger Brian Wilson, I just found astonishing. Really special. I liked the movie too. Elizabeth Banks and John Cusack…all of them. Such a good film.” Again, the mp3.

At the recent Love & Mercy Brian Wilson concert at Vibrato: (l. to r.) Melinda Ledbetter, Paul Dano, Brian Wilson, Elizabeth Banks.

I know a little something about the trials of a rock band (having been a mediocre drummer in my early 20s in a not-half-bad blues rock group called the Sludge Brothers) and the difficulties of creating a sound that works and recording it the right way and getting the right gigs, etc. And yet Martin Scorsese and Mick Jagger‘s Vinyl, to go by this trailer and previous teasers, seems uninterested in the brick-and-mortar stuff. It looks like just another bacchanalian coke-and-booze Satyricon thing. Self-destruction (or dangerously flirting with same) by way of drugs and booze is not interesting. Almost Famous was 15 years ago — it would be great if Vinyl was more like it. You know…a longform about the music business of the late ’60s and ’70s that takes a Spotlight approach — one that shows you how it really works in a survivalist, real-world sense (songs, recordings, relationships, beautiful women, wild adventures, creative clear-light moments, finding and keeping the right manager…the general uphill struggle of it all). You know what would be really great? A longform about the creative-transcendence boom years of ’64, ’65, ’66 and ’67. It was all over by late ’68 anyway. There’s nothing more boring in the universe of narrative film than getting fucking wasted.

Alejandro G. Inarritu‘s The Revenant (20th Century Fox, 12.25) will be screened this weekend for the Hollywood Foreign Press Association, and soon after for the rest of us. The embargo-lift review date is December 2nd. 12.25 is the platform date; the wide release begins January 8th. Oh, and David O. Russell‘s Joy (20th Century Fox, 12.25) will begin screening after Thanksgiving, perhaps as soon as 11.27 but more likely on 11.30. Russell has been fiddling and re-fiddling with it right to the end. (A Joy cast member confided as much during last weekend’s Carol brunch.) One way or another Joy and The Revenant will be late arrivals as far as SAG members-getting-their-DVD-screeners are concerned. Oh, and Quentin Tarantino‘s The Hateful Eight (the 70mm, three-hour version with an intermission) screened recently at the Linwood Dunn, and a friend who attended was appreciative but measured in his response. It is an Agatha Christie thing for a good portion, he said. He expressed an interest in seeing the ten-minute-shorter wide-release version, which he believes will be shown without an intermission.

Full-size rendering by HE reader “BromanBrolanski”

“An Open Letter from Charlie Sheen and Statement from his Physician,” received an hour ago from Scoop Marketing’s Larry Solters:

Sheen: “Roughly four years ago, I suddenly found myself in the throws of a seismic and debilitating three-day cluster-migraine like headache. I was emergently hospitalized with what I believed to be a brain tumor or perhaps some unknown pathology. I was partially correct. Following a battery of endless tests, that included a hideous spinal tap, it was sadly and shockingly revealed to me that I was, in fact, positive for HIV.

“The news was a ‘mule kick’ to my soul. Those impossible words I absorbed and then tried to convince myself, that I was stuck, suspended, or even stranded inside some kind of alternate reality or nightmare, were to the absolute contrary. I was awake. It was true. Reality.

“Under the brilliant and perfect care of Dr. Robert Huizenga as well as ‘the’ leading infectious disease expert in the known universe, I began a rigorous and intensive treatment program. Not missing a beat, a med dose, or one shred of guidance, quickly my viral loads became undetectable. Like every other challenge in my life, again, I was victorious and kicking this disease’s ass. I wish my story had ended there. Unfortunately, for my family and myself, it had only just begun.

Deadline‘s Pete Hammond knows that The Revenant is going to be a wham-bammer and an all-but-certain Best Picture contender, and he acknowledges that Leonardo DiCaprio is “due” so pay very little attention to his “I haven’t seen his performance so I’m not saying anything” line. He knows DiCaprio is all but in, and he knows Michael Fassbender‘s Steve Jobs performance is on the ropes and probably plummeting as we speak, and he knows Tom Hanks‘ “subtle” performance in Bridge of Spies is a totally generic, bonded and branded “Tom Hanks performance” (i.e., Mr. Saturday Evening Post) and relatively weak tea…not even remotely close to Gregory Peck‘s performance in To Kill A Mockingbird. Hammond knows all this. He also knows that Jay Roach‘s Trumbo is not really “a great movie,” as he calls it…he knows that. (Trumbo is, however, a good film.) Hammond and Gold Derby‘s Tom O’Neil acknowledge that Michael Caine‘s Youth campaign is all about the gold-watch factor, and Hammond says Concussion‘s Will Smith is “definitely” in the game…we’ll see about that. All this aside, hooray for Mr. Holmes‘ Ian McKellen — a brilliant thesp and one of the most gracious guys I’ve ever known.

Remember the good old days (i.e., two years ago) when Criterion would create its own uniquely designed covers for Bluray/DVDs of classic films? Compare their 2014 On The Waterfront cover art to the jacket cover for their upcoming Bluray of Mike Nichols‘ The Graduate, which will pop on 2.23.16. I don’t think I need to point anything out here. Okay, I’ll point something out. Criterion has gone totally generic here. Teenage movie buffs in Pakistan and Manchuria are bored to death by this crusty, age-old shot of a barefooted Dustin Hoffman regarding Anne Bancroft‘s stockinged calf, but Criterion used it anyway.

The Graduate Bluray is worth the purchase price, however, because it contains one of the finest, most richly observed analytical commentary tracks about a classic film ever recorded. I’m referring to UCLA film professor Howard Suber‘s observations about The Graduate, which were included on Criterion’s original 1987 Graduate laser disc. Suber’s commentary was briefly available on a YouTube posting a year ago but was taken down for some reason, but it’ll be fully and legally available on the new Bluray — the first time in a new format in 28 years.