In late February a longtime reader and major-studio employee asked for my help to get in touch with a certain flamboyant character who no longer posts on this site, largely due to issues sired by alcohol.
“I’m interested in offering [this guy] a little guidance and help setting up a platform for his writing that makes him feel comfortable,” the reader explained, “but without being overly formal as he’s expressed a lack of interest in that sort of thing. I do believe with the right assistance, he might be able to get his shit together a bit.
So I wrote the guy back and gave him contact info for the flamboyant fellow in question, but added the following: “You will find, I suspect, that he’s devoted to living a life behind the eight-ball. He is devoted to being miserable and alcoholic and frustrated, because, oddly, these qualities are what keep him ‘on the edge,’ where he feels he needs to be.
“He doesn’t want to thrive and win. He wants to lose. Or at least, this is how he sees things while he’s drinking. There is no winning with a drinking person as long as he/she is drinking. But it’s very good of you to offer him some assistance, and I hope it works out. Have a good day and a great weekend.”
Last night, or roughly three weeks after he first wrote me, the studio employee sent me the following message:
“You were quite right. The guy really doesn’t want to improve his life at the moment. I consider this a shame. It seems [the character in question] will have to hit rock bottom and learn the hard way before he ever decides to change. Cheers to your attempts at better living, as chronicled recently in the column. A tough thing to do. Hope you’re steady as she goes.”
To which I replied: “Yeah, I’m doing fine…thanks. I knew your generosity would fall on deaf ears. Alcoholics don’t want to know anything, and you can’t tell them anything.”