Spoilers: You can’t conclude the sixth and second-to-last episode of Mare of Easttown by pointing the guilty finger at a pathetic, self-loathing fellow (Robbie Tann‘s “Billy Ross”) who’s ready to shoot himself, and then begin the final episode by switching things around and identifying the self-loather’s older brother, Joe Tippett‘s “John Ross”, as the actual killer.

Okay, you can do that but you’re gettin’ twisty-for-the-sake-of-twisty on us.

And then you let that settle in for 25 or 30 minutes, and then you change horses again within the last 12 to 15 and reveal the actual, real-deal shooter as Cameron Mann‘s “Ryan Ross,” the son of suddenly-not-guilty-anymore John and his ex, Julianne Nicholson‘s “Lori Ross.”

Seriously?

It just didn’t work, that last switcheroo — there was just no believing it, and there was certainly no catharsis in considering the crazy impulse of a ten year old who lost his temper or whatever. It’s just a tragic waste.

What’s Ryan gonna do, suffer in juvenile detention for the next ten years or so? He made a ghastly mistake. In what way is the state’s interest served by keeping him in stir?

From TIFF spokesperson: “We’re bringing back favourite in-person experiences from last year like drive-ins, outdoor cinemas, and socially distanced indoor screenings. We’ll talk more about those in the coming weeks, but today I’m excited to share that digital film screenings will return for film lovers all across Canada.”
Yup, they’re going digital again.”

The AMC Century City looks like a grand palazzo as you approach the main entrance. And then you buy your ticket and step on the escalator, and you can’t help but feel the “thank God the nightmare is nearly over” vibes. Fun, relaxed, festive. Glad to be here.

The AMC is well-maintained and clean-smelling, but you can sense the initial sparkle sinking into the wall-to-wall carpet as you contemplate what this place is really about — the snorting of junk food and junk movies.

For this is a House of Proles — not a church of cinema worship but a folksy, rowdy, laid-back sporting atmosphere…a collection of mob-comfort stadiums.

Welcome to the thundering Century Colisseum Megalopolis, where everyone — families, couples, loners — has come to see A Quiet Place, Part II. But the first order of business is being blasted into submission by the chest-pounding, ear-shattering trailers, each squarely aimed at the ADD sensibilities of gorillas and goons and the Chinese audience…wham…WHAM!…WHAM!!

And then, at long last, John Krasinki’s decent enough sequel.

I tapped out a brief reaction last night: Yes, it’s a cut or two above. But I hated those moving head–flap, crab–leg CG monsters and their idiotic screechy howls, and I really hated Emily Blunt and her kids walking barefoot over jagged stones, leaves, branches and so on. They can’t wear flip-flops or Vans? Cillian Murphy wears lace-up boots — can anyone explain why he didn’t get the barefoot memo? Ditto the briefly seen Djimon Hounsou‘and his kids…no bare feet.

But it all feels carefully pushed and over-acted and very much like a “sequel”, and is nothing to get too excited about.

In the view of Variety‘s Owen Gleiberman, the theatres vs. stream-it-at-home debate “already has the overheated dimension of a culture war. To go or not to go? To believe in the primacy of the communal, cathartic big-screen experience or to see it as a stodgy, unhip relic?

“No one thought this way about the movie theater versus VHS or DVD; the industry wasted no time transforming those technologies into ancillary markets that helped keep movies afloat. But streaming has changed the chemistry. The two radically different ways of experiencing filmed dramatic entertainment (theater vs. home) will now be competing as never before, and in some ways it’s a battle of cachet. For the moment, the TV medium has won the cool contest.

“That’s why the Memorial Day box office returns felt not just like an indicator, but an early salvo of that war.”

I can’t even begin for another hour or two, in fact. Domestic pressures. 4:25 pm update: Still futzing around? C’mon, man…

But first I have to squeeze in a late Sunday afternoon viewing of A Quiet Place II, which a sharp journo pally is calling “awful.”

“Covid-infected bats in a Wuhan wet market”? Not any longer.

Scott Gottlieb is an American physician and investor who served as the 23rd commissioner of the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) from 2017 until April 2019.

“These kinds of lab leaks happen all the time,” @ScottGottliebMD says of COVID-19 lab-leak theory. “Even here in the United States, we’ve had mishaps. In China, the last six known outbreaks of SARS-1 have been out of labs.” pic.twitter.com/NX2iWBIdBx

— Face The Nation (@FaceTheNation) May 30, 2021

We all understand Martin Scorsese‘s currently-shooting Killers of the Flower Moon is based upon David Grann‘s “Killers of the Flower Moon: The Osage Murders and the Birth of the FBI“, which was published in April 2017.

It’s about the racially motivated Osage Murders — roughly 60 wealthy Osage Native Americans killed by white supremacists over oil money — that happened between 1918 and ’31.

“The genocide by white America against Native nations during the century leading up to Grann’s period is a metaphor for humanity’s decimation of the natural world which the Natives saw as sacred,” wrote The Guardian‘s Ed Vulliamy. “Grann’s book is a timely and disturbing chapter in the original, terrible atrocity.”

I don’t know enough about Scorsese’s $200 million Apple adaptation to ask anything more than rudimentary questions. I only know the various summaries of Grann’s book, and what’s happened with the film so far, etc. I guess I know a few things, but concerns are welling inside.

I’m feeling this primal fear that Killers, when you boil it all down, is going to play like some kind of huge WHITE MEA CULPA “EXPUNGE THE EVIL” APOLOGY FILM…as in “BLM and 1619 and the woke community have been hammering home the scope of current white venality, and now we’re going to dramatize what it was like back in the 1920s…more hammering!”

In so doing the film will no doubt say (as it should) that the murderous savagery that William Hale (Robert De Niro) and Ernest Burkhart (Leonardo DiCaprio) and other venals perpetrated upon the Osage Nation commmunity…what happened back then was horrific.

But is this strictly a violent history lesson, or is there a 2021 echo in this thing? Will the film simply be saying “look at the horrors that happened nearly 100 years ago” and let it go at that? Or will it be saying “it wasn’t just Hale and his murderous deeds that we’re sorry for as much as the innate evil within ourselves, for there are pieces and slivers of William Hale in all of us, God forgive ourselves and our ancestors, and so white Americans need to atone and atone and atone again.”

I, Jeffrey Wells from suburban New Jersey, may in fact be a chip off the old Devil Incarnate (or perhaps a nephew of the beast who mounted and impregnated Mia Farrow in Rosemary’s Baby) whose ancestors brought horrific racial malice to this once-virgin land. And yes, America may in fact be the ugliest, most racially poisoned serpent’s nest of a country in the history of the globe…nobody’s arguing that.

On top of which Mark Wahlberg is looking….what’s a delicate way to put this?…older. It happens. If you were born in ’71, certain changes will kick in by ’21. A new phase.

I wanted to escape this film faster than Lou Costello wanted to escape the haunted master bedroom in Hold That Ghost. Ian Shorr‘s script has been described as Wanted meets The Matrix. Based on D. Eric Maikranz‘s “The Reincarnationist Papers.”

Perfect song, perfect mix, perfect delivery…nothing amiss.

The following Facebook discussion excerpts, launched by Paul Schrader‘s description of an erotic dream, were actually posted this morning:

Schrader: “Last night I had a dream straight from the #MeToo times. I was filming a scene in which I was sexually humiliating a beautiful actress Before each take I described what I was going to do and received her permission on film to do so. And then did it. By the way, I have never filmed such a scene. But I did just finish a new (mildly erotic) script in six days straight, so perhaps that explains by overheated dream.”

“What I found interesting about the dream is that the ID will always emerge even if it has to wear a #MeToo dress.”

HE to Schrader: “No matter how you phrase it, how you shot it, what kind of assurances you received from the dream actress…none of that matters. What matters is that you dreamt about ‘sexually humiliating a beautiful actress,’ and by that admission alone you are GUILTY in the eyes of the mob…period.

“You know, of course, that there are Twitter jackals out there, drooling and licking their chops and ready to pounce upon the slightest not-woke-enough provocation. Why even mention this kind of dream? You know what the fanatics will do with it. We are living in 1794 Paris. If you want to live, you can’t even imagine yourself to be an ally of Georges Danton, who in real life was known for certain ravenous sexual appetites. ”

Schrader to HE: “So dictates Jeffrey Freud Wells. Off to the Gallows — and take your dreams with you!” More: “Gee, Jeffrey, we’re all dying to hear your PG dreams. Maybe the one about how you lost the keys to your car?”

HE to Schrader: “I’ve been losing keys and even wallets all my life. Last year I absentmindedly dropped my wallet into a dumpster so don’t tell me.” Later: Here’s a dream posted on 3.21.20.”

Facebook friendo #1: “Paul, how dare you, as a serious artist, attempt to decipher a dream you had while engaging people in an adult conversation? Apparently policing thoughts isn’t enough, dreams need to be included as well.”

Slow-on-the-pickup Facebook friendo: “Seriously, Jeffrey?”

Dean Michael Kuehn: “Well, I guess many of us are one step away from the Future Crime Unit locking us up then.”

Nic Valle: “Seriously, guy. Art can no longer be art when feelings can light it on fire out of existence.”

HE to Valle: “Are you guys really this clueless? Are you living in sealed-off chambers?

Alan Ormsby: “The #MeToo dream police will hear about this!”

Michael Brakemeyer: “Danton was on the right side of history, so I would have probably sided with him.”

I later explained to the Schrader community that I was “attempting to satirically channel the spirit of today’s Maximilien Robespierre virus. As in ‘hello?…anybody home or sniffing the air?'”

Los Angeles-residing Facebook friendo: “Your comment has clearly been misunderstood.”

HE to LA friendo: “And that’s on me? I can’t be responsible for the failure of Facebook people to comprehend the current political atmosphere, and what has been clearly stated by yours truly. If they want to walk around oblivious to the prevailing climate of terror, that’s their decision.”

Headline says it all. All is well until the next crisis. A heartfelt thanks to the Good Samaritan rescuer, who shall remain nameless.