All real men accept the idea of occasionally pouring hot tap water into a cup filled with Starbucks instant coffee, and being more or less okay with that. I know this sounds like a bit but I’m serious. Sometimes you have to suck it in and say “okay, not perfect but good enough.”

If you’re one of those prissy guys who insists on putting on the hush puppies and going down to the hotel restaurant and asking for a pot of steaming hot water on a tray along with a nice cup, saucer, spoon and cloth napkin…if you insist on all the proper trimmings then you’re probably too metrosexual, or in this context not really a man. Certainly not by the Hollywood Elsewhere definition of that term.

Yes, I’ve described myself as confidently metrosexual in the past but it’s actually more of a mixture of this plus the usual samurai poet warrior thing plus the spirit of Lee Marvin in the mid’ 60s, particularly the guy he played in The Professionals and not so much “Walker” in Point Blank.