Because of recent social-media accusations of cunnilingus cannibalism, Armie Hammer has either relinquished or lost a second major role. In the wake of dropping out of a costarring role opposite Jennifer Lopez in Shotgun Wedding, Hammer has lost the role of Godfather producer Al Ruddy in a forthcoming Paramount Plus series called The Offer, a behind-the-scenes story of the making of Francis Coppola‘s 1972 classic.

Tom Hagen: When a famous actor was accused of cunnilingus cannibalism in the old days, the studio would take care of it. Cunnilingus cannibals were always given a second chance, and sometimes a third or even a fourth. The studio helped out, and the families were allowed to keep their fortunes.

Armie Hammer: Yeah, but only the superstars, Tom. Famous, second-tier actors like myself got knocked off and all their estates went back to the studios and the banks. Unless they went home and killed themselves, then nothing happened. And the families…the families were taken care of.

Hagen: That was a good break. A nice deal.

Hammer: Yeah. They went home and sat in a hot bath, opened up their veins and bled to death. And sometimes they had a little party before they did it.

Hagen: Don’t worry about anything, Armie.

Seriously — does poor Armie Hammer really have to die because of certain sexual proclivities that strike most of us as weird? Because of certain kinky but allegedly consensual relationships that were recently revealed, Hammer is suddenly in big career trouble. Various women have came forward about abuse, including inappropriate and nonconsensual behavior they had allegedly experienced from Hammer.

I don’t know much about B&D sexuality and okay, Hammer may have ignored a safe word or two. But is this really a hanging offense? It feels like Hammer’s stripes are being torn off and his battle sabre broken in two.