People are whooping and cheering on my street in West Hollywood. Strangers are bear-hugging each other. Well, not really…but it’s lots of fun to imagine this because this is truly a day to kiss the sky. Paris Hilton — God bless those courageous L.A. city attorneys! — has been sent back to jail in Lynwood to serve out her 23 (or is it 45?) days minus five, even though she’s done only three. Ding-dong, the empty dumb bitch is back in the slammer!

TMZ reports that Hilton left the courtroom in tears, screaming, “Mom, Mom…Mom!” Good! Hilton was also heard saying “It’s not right.” No, no, it’s very right — the rightest thing to happen in this country in a long, long time. A witness said that Paris was “physically escorted” out of the courtroom by a female deputy, and that her mother was later seen pacing the hallways and telling reporters, “I’m paralyzed right now.” Good! In fact, have a stroke!
Los Angeles City Attorney Rocky Delgadillo issued this statement to TMZ in response to Judge Sauer’s decision ordering Hilton back to jail: “This decision sends the message that no individual — no matter how wealthy or powerful — is above the law. Today, justice was served.” If the Wizard of Oz Munchkins were to sing a song to Delgadillo about this, one of the lines would go, “We thank you very sweetly for doing it so neatly.”