In a just posted State of the Union interview with Jake Tapper, Donald Trump claims that he has a “very great relationship with God.” As opposed to…what, a mildly fulfilling relationship with the Almighty? What Trump meant, I think, is that he has a Thomas Becket-like attitude. Trump respects God as far as interviews with the media are concerned, but he doesn’t worry about His judgment all that much, as he is fairly secure in the knowledge that God doesn’t judge anyone or anything. So in Trump’s mind they’ve agreed to leave each other alone.

I began my life feeling very angry at God for giving me such a miserable life in suburban New Jersey and especially giving me such strict, hard-nosed parents, particularly a mother who made me go to church every damn Sunday. Then in my teens I went through a period of mocking and taunting him. Then I embraced and worshipped Him as a result of my mystical LSD trips in my early 20s. Then I came to a Trump-like understanding that God is, depending on how lucky or unlucky you are in terms of parental or tribal lineage and birth location, at best impartial about whether you’re living a happy or miserable life.

Then again God does give you the freedom to become someone like Donald Trump or David Bowie or whomever. If you want happiness and you’re not living under a horrible dictatorship, orchestrate your own version of it without making things worse for others.

Trump’s private meditation the day before yesterday: “What nameless, inscrutable, unearthly thing is it…what cruel, remorseless emperor commands me against all natural lovings and longings that I keep pushing, and crowding, and jamming myself on all the time, recklessly making me ready to do what in my own proper, natural heart, I would not so much as dare? Is Trump, Trump? Is it I, God, or who that lifts this arm? But if the great sun move not of itself but is as an errand boy in heaven, nor one single star can revolve but by some invisible power, how then can this one small heart beat, this one small brain think thoughts unless God does that beating, does that thinking, does that living, and not I?”

God doesn’t care at all. He’ll shine bright sun, love you, nourish your land with rain and rich minerals, make you rich or poor, drown you, plague you, abuse you, Holocaust you, rape your cities, cut off your heads…anything that any earth-residing monster dreams up and wants to do, God will go along. As Al Pacino/Tony Gilroy once said, “He’s an absentee landlord.” And Trump is cool with this.