Monkey Mind Pong

This is big news, a huge development…seriously. Down the road it will help invalids enormously. It could eventually lead to writers composing articles and novels without using keyboards or fingers.

Posted on 4.8 by CNET’s Jackson Ryan: “Neuralink, the brain implant start-up founded by SpaceX head honcho and self-appointed ‘technoking’ Elon Musk, has unveiled a new video of a nine-year-old monkey named ‘Pager’ playing Pong…with its brain.

“The three-minute video shows Pager learning to control a computer with his brain activity. At first, the monkey uses a joystick to interact with the computer for a ‘tasty banana smoothie, delivered through a straw.’

“The narrator states Pager has two Neuralink devices implanted in his brain. The devices, which Musk calls a ‘Fitbit for your skull,’ were revealed at a press briefing in August 2020.

“As Pager plays through the games, the narrator explains the Neuralink devices in his brain are reading his brain activity and that activity is being decoded by a computer. When the team disconnect the joystick, Pager keeps playing the game — and the brain-implant allows him to play MindPong, as Neuralink has dubbed it.”

Ballad of Sad Trombone

Two days ago (4.8) the N.Y. Times reported that Devin Murphy, Rep. Matt Gaetz‘s legislative director, has quit. He’s out due to media coverage of the feds looking into sex trafficking allegations against the Trump-supporting Florida congressman, who is almost certainly toast at this stage of the game.

But out of this resignation came two signature lines that are, as of this moment, newly popularized.

Axios has reported that in an email sent to Republican legislative directors this morning (i.e., 4.10), Murphy wrote, “It’s been real”…definitely! The subject line of the email was “Well…bye.”

As HE followers know, “Bye!” is the line spoken several times by the body-inhabiting monster in Jack Sholder‘s The Hidden (’88). And of course, Murphy’s insertion of “well” before “bye” changes the context — it implies “okay, somebody fucked up here….not me but somebody.”

Axios adds that as of Saturday afternoon, Murphy’s automated email response says: “I am no longer with the office of Congressman Matt Gaetz. Womp womp. Cue the sad trombone.”

For Every Issue, A Remedy

It’s not that I wasn’t listening to the testimony of Dr. Andrew Baker, the Hennepin County medical examiner who performed the initial autopsy of George Floyd, but I kept thinking that I could hook Baker up with my Prague hair guy, and that his bald spot problem would be history after two visits at $2K each.

Baker testified that while Derek Chauvin‘s knee on Floyd’s neck was the primary cause of death, drug use and heart disease were lesser contributing factors.

Nice Hang

A round-table dinner at Novita (102 E. 22nd St.) in the Grammercy/Flatiron district. Cait and Tatiana were on the other side. Jett was born on 6.4.88…life sure as shit moves on.

Despairing Oscars…Da Wokeness

“Judging by this year’s Best Picture nominees, you couldn’t have a worse time at the movies if there was an active shooter in the theatre.”

Maher isn’t describing overall Hollywood output, but the “if we play along with the wokester narrative maybe they won’t come after us” rationale, hence the Best Picture noms. Many industry people secretly despise the prevailing climate of terror. Blah pandemic Oscars…kill me.

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Feinberg Also Forecasting Mulligan Loss

It’s no longer just Variety‘s Clayton Davis predicting the collapse of the Carey Mulligan for Best Actress campaign, which seemed like a safe bet until Viola Davis‘s Best Actress SAG win. Now The Hollywood Reporter‘s Scott Feinberg has also thrown in the Mulligan towel, relegating her to a third-place slot among the five Oscar nominees for Best Actress.

Feinberg is also, bizarrely, predicting that Nomadland‘s Frances McDormand will take the Best Actress trophy — which of course will be her third. I thought her minimal campaign plus “she’s already won twice” meant she wouldn’t prevail.

My Head Is Spinning

As we all know, the usual personal pronouns — those pesky “he”, “she” and traditional “they” terms that have been commonly used and understood by English speakers for several hundred years — are being gradually nudged aside in favor of less gender-specific pronouns, largely due to a certain urban strata of Millennials and Zoomers.

This will presumably lead to a more widespread abandonment among the general population as the decades progress.

This is happening in order to show more respect and consideration for transgender folk, who have called out the cisgender majority for their use of prejudicial or discriminating terminology. The trans community represents 0.6% of U.S. adults.

From “A Guide to Neopronouns,” a 4.8.21 N.Y. Times article by Ezra Marcus: “A personal pronoun is a form of speech that stands in for a person or group of people. She is having opinions online; they are fighting in the comments; and, of course, as in the Prince song made famous by Sinead O’Connor, ‘Nothing Compares 2 U.’

“Nonbinary pronouns, as well — often the singular ‘they’ and ‘them’ — have become widespread. A 2019 Pew Research study found already that one in five Americans knew someone who uses nonbinary pronouns.

“And then there are neopronouns.

“A neopronoun can be a word a created to serve as pronoun without expressing gender, like ‘ze’ and ‘zir.’

“A neopronoun can also be a so-called ‘noun-self pronoun,’ in which a pre-existing word is drafted into use as a pronoun. Noun-self pronouns can refer to animals — so your pronouns can be ‘bun/bunself’ and ‘kitten/kittenself.’ Others refer to fantasy characters — ‘vamp/vampself,’ ‘prin/cess/princesself,’ ‘fae/faer/faeself’ — or even just common slang, like ‘Innit/Innits/Innitself.'”

What the actual fuck?

Persistent Moron Factor

From “Why Mississippi Has Few Takers for 73,000 Covid Shots,” a 4.9 N.Y. Times story by Andrew Jacobs:

“A closer look at Mississippi’s demographics explains why [Covid vaccine] hesitancy may be especially pronounced. The state reliably votes Republican, a group that remains highly skeptical of the coronavirus vaccine. Nearly half of all Republican men and 40 percent of Republicans over all have said they do not plan to get vaccinated, according to several recent surveys.

“Those figures have barely budged in the months since vaccines first became available. By contrast, just 4 percent of Democrats have said they will not get the vaccine.

“Another factor in the state’s low vaccination rate may be Mississippi’s large Black community, which comprises 38 percent of the state’s population but accounts for 31 percent of the doses administered, according to state data.

“Vaccine hesitancy remains somewhat high among African-Americans, though the doubts and distrust — tied to longstanding neglect by the health care system and past government malfeasance like the notorious Tuskegee syphilis experiments — have markedly declined in recent months.

“The hesitancy has national implications. Experts say between 70 percent to 90 percent of all Americans must be vaccinated for the country to reach herd immunity, the point at which the virus can no longer spread through the population.”

Militant Clean Freak

…compulsive scrubber, wiper, Lysol freak, vacuumer and re-vacuumer…”this is a pig’s place!” It takes all sorts to make a world, and nobody (myself included) wants anything to do with dirt or unclean carpets or unwashed dishes or dust bunnies. A messy house always indicates a messy psychology, and cleanliness is next to godliness, etc. But living in a permanent Mommy Dearest atmosphere takes a toll.

Kardashian Sneakers

Early this morning I felt very slightly offended by a woman wearing Kardashian sneakers — white, gold and black design. It happened at a Starbucks on Sixth and 56th. And then I moved on and forgot about it. I don’t get hung up on this stuff.

99 Years

Respect for the late Prince Philip, the Duke of Edinburgh, upon his passing. His 100th birthday would’ve happened in June. Born in 1921 and hailing from Danish royal lineage, Philip married the future Queen Elizabeth in 1947 (they had first met in 1934) and he hung in there — loyalty-wise, protocol-wise, dignity-wise, appearance-wise — for 73 or 74 years. They had four children — Charles, Anne, Andrew and Edward.

Life is short, and then it’s over. We’re here. Then we’re not here. We’re somewhere else…maybe. And it’s as natural as breathing.

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