…would be even faintly excited about seeing David Gordon Green‘s Halloween Kills (Universal/Peacock, 10.15), especially given the fact that it’s only the middle-chapter in DGG’s grown-up Michael Myers vs. Laurie Strode trilogy — Halloween (’18), Halloween Kills and 2022’s Halloween Ends.

The franchise killer respectfully requests that you wire all payments to his business manager, not his agent.

Halloween Kills is the twelfth godforsaken installment in the franchise.